TALK TO ME!!!!!!!

I think the reason they say that the chase is more exciting than the orgasm is because most women don’t have an orgasm. WHY!! Because they fake it so damn much there man doesn’t know what actually pleases them so he does what he did before not knowing that it wasn’t real. Therefore the woman is left unsatisfied. If women actually tell there man what they like and how they want it I am pretty sure the chase will not be better than the actual orgasm. #2 Yes a woman cares about the compliments, I just spent all this time and money to look good you better damn notice it, getting dressed and dolled up is a way to make sure the attention stays on the female that you are with and not wandering around looking at the others walking around.

THE FIRST QUESTION ANSWER: IT DEPENDS ON WHAT THE GUY DOES AND IF WHAT THE GUY DID REALLY EVEN MEANS SOMETHING TO ME.

THE SECOND QUESTION ANSWER: IT DOES MATTER BECAUSE MOST TIMES WHEN FEMALE PUT THE TIME INTO GETTING READY IT FOR THE GUY TO ENJOY. BECAUSE MOST (NOT ALL OF THEM BUT MOST) DUDES DONT WANT PLAIN JANE LOOKIN GIRLS.

I’ll be the first to answer lol.
To your question 2

I get dressed up cause I want to not for no damn man lol. I will take a hour for hair and makeup to go to the mall or to the grocery store. I just want to look fly before I walk out thats all.

Overall answer to your question. I prefer a man to court me and chase me. Sex doesn’t come first for me it comes last.
The spiritually connection with the lord comes first. I like a man finding things about me and enjoying me without makeup just loving me for me.

@Spock not all women think Sex=Love there are a lot of women who just want to have sex with no strings attached and then there goes the double standards thrown at them. Sometimes when do get dressed up for themselves just to feel better it’s not always about catching a guys attention.

I’m a guy and to respond to question 1, I think the more sex a person has the more meaningless it will be. So with that said…the chase will always be more exciting.

When it comes to question 2, I understand women get dolled up for hours at a time just to get those compliments, but honestly guys don’t really give a D. I mean, a female can look nice in 20mins. But as a guy who can appreciate a woman who looks good, I guess it does deserve compliments.

*Ignores spocks know it all ass for a min* My answer to question 1 is no. I enjoy both equally. Question 2? I would have to say no again. Because I don’t do the typical female “all dolled up” thing. I don’t wear makeup, dresses or skirts. In other words, I’m not the girly type. LOL Never have been. If I look good to me than I’m good with that. I don’t look for compliments and don’t expect them. That’s how you get your feelings get broke by expecting something you may or may not get. And for the record, my showers last longer than getting dressed. LOL I’ve never understood why some females need 4 hrs to a whole day to get ready. Just wasting your time especially if you’re going to the club. LOL

As for what Dr. Spock said. If he and I were to ever meet he would change his story. I have sex for sex, not for love….that’s just stupid (imo). If sex equates love, then one might have some self esteem issues. I love because I’m in love and I love to have sex when in a relationship. Two separate things in my book.

“I hate when women get all dressed up to go to club and then act like they don’t want to be bothered….STAY HOME!!!” LOL I had friends like that. I would look at them and wonder why they came to the club in the first dayum place!!! smh

Question #1 – Yeahh thts sexyyy , its what turns you on too get pumped & ready .

Question #2 – Omgg YESS!! It makes them fell like you not only want the Pu**y but
you also compliment how good they look when they look it !

When it comes to the chase it’s because the man is doing everything right, picking you up on time, have the dates planned out. Once the relationship progress and the anticipation increases you realize you want to know what he is like sexally, is he going to be creative like the dates, is he going to take care of your needs sexually or is he going to be selfish. That’s why women want a man who is creative and thoughtful. The idea that a women dresses for a man is crazy we actually dress for other women to notice us not the man, because men could care less about the difference between a wedge or stilleto going with that dress or not they just want the dress to come off but another woman will notice the shoies don’t fit the dress.

Ok first you honestly have to take age into consideration..just being honest….I read Monie’s comment and Spock to women that are older see the chase as a good thing because we do not just want to just have empty sex..it means more…..so yes we love for the man to make an effort…take us out to dinner…call and talk to us…give us some cuddle time…then yeah u might get it…for younger women once again speaking from being a woman that was younger and from looking at the younger ones I know…it is not a big deal to them..so for me yes the chase is important..when I lay with a man I don’t want the connection to be quick ..pant..done…i’m out…come on now…..a man takes his time getting to know a female before he takes it to that level…a boy is a hit and run

Second some women do dress to gather attention…a woman likes it when a man is proud to hae her on his arm…makes her and him feel good…but I personally dress to make me feel good….If I can’t feel good then what in the world…

#1 NO! NOTHING IS MORE EXCITING THAN AN ORGASM!! BUSTIN ONE OFF IS THEEEEEE BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD! THE CHASE IS NICE AND IT DOES MAKE SEX MORE EXCITING THAN THE NORM BUT IT HAS NOTHING ON GETTING AN ORGASM! THAT FEELING IS JUST WAY TO INTENSE!

#2 NO! NOT ME! I LOVE IT WHEN A MAN CARES ABOUT WHAT I LOOK LIKE WHEN IM JUST IN CHILL MODE. IF HE THINKS IM SEXY AND BEAUTIFUL WITHOUT MAKE UP THAN THATS WHEN I CARE. ITS A TURN ON KNOWING THAT A MAN OR YOUR MAN THINKS UR GORGEOUS AT ANY GIVEN TIME. NOT JUST WHEN UR DOLLED UP! MAKE UP AND TIGHT GEAR CAN MAKE ANYONE LOOK GOOD…

Q1: The sex is the climax of all the attention and the thrill of the chase, to be connected to someone on an emotionally high level can be so much more of a high than the sex ur gonna have later. The foreplay is always a girls favorite because we know we have the control. You can be in a different frame of mind when the hot sex come into play, but the chase and the courting make you feel like your man is there on a higher level.

Q2: When a lady gets all made up it makes herself feel sexy not just for her man. If she feels that she looks good her sex appeal and attitude is flying high….in her mind. And if her man doesn’t signal that, then what the hell’s wrong. So we take long getting ready sometimes….but shit we come out feelin good and ready to work it for all to see!

LOL#1 A chase is just tht…whts the point of it if its not genuine interest overall! Who wants a nigga just chasing 4 the cooch??? Lol! Thts quite corney#2 I wanna look good for me,thts def not about a man, if he compliments me thts an extra point, but if not cool;-) an @ spock if u can’t be out with a women an another women walks pass with a (as u said a fat ass) and u can’t control looking then u have issues….thts so disrespectful…SMH I TOTALLY AGREED WITH TELLINGTHETRUTH101

I agree wit Spock 500%. At the end of the day…..that’s how the cookie crumbles!!!

DUDES DONT KNOW HOW TO FUCK RIGHT….A 23 YEAR OLD WOMAN TOLD ME THE OTHER DAY THAT SHE HAS NEVER HAD A MAN PLAY WIT HER PUSSY…AND SHE HAS HAD AT LEAST 5 PARTNERS (IN LADY SPEAK SHE PROLLY AT 15). DUDES JUST WANNA FUCK AND DONT WANNA TAKE TIME AND FREAK ON WOMEN. IM 29 WE TOOK JUST AS MUCH PRIDE IN FREAKING A WOMAN AS WE DID ACTUALLY HAVING SEX WITH THEM.

GET YOUR SEX GAME RIGHT GENTLEMEN…OR YA CHICK GONNA BE FUCKIN SOME OL TROY (FROM WHY DID I GET MARRIED) ASS DUDE.

AND PAYPACHAYSE WILL LEAVE YOU WITH THE NEW ANTHEM “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN”

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Thanks Fatihah I agree with you too.

#1 The things leading to the chase are great it adds that extra steam to the tea pot. so when it gets hot enough, that and everything will whistle!!! then the sex is hehehe “#1”
#2 i get dressed to make me feel good. if that pleases some random dude then that just boosts me up a lil and i may just walk a little harder.

@spock comment WOW yet “The sex is good but after the sex I am on to the next hunt. Now if she has muscle control she will keep my attention a little longer but other then that I’m like NEXT” are you serious the days of jumpin sacks should be gone once you hit 30…. “c’mon son” <—edlover face

Imma agree wit my girl fah. I get dressed for me! n if iget a compliment yay if not oh well

If a female dress up for me that’s sexy. It’s stimulating. I love the chase before the orgasm. I want my lady to be as involved with this process as I am. The feedback is very important. It has to be genuinely positive. I think women love eye contact during sex and they also want to hear compliments. It can be about the most intimate of things. Hell it can be about her good stuff if you know what I mean. Its all stimulation. The more both parties concentrate on the other person, the better the sex will be. All of the energy goes to one place. The orgasm.

The chase is very flattering and appreciated but if the sex is garbage that’s a definite ..WTF.. but if the sex is the bomb then we can go places!! lol 🙂

oh, hit me up on twitter..gore24

IF a man can F**K my mind and my body………..HELLLLLL YES!!!!!!
I’m a bitch i want it both ways!

P.S. im 23 I dont know how people older than me feel

hey JD I FEEL THE CHASE IS ONLY BETTER THAN THE CATCH IF THIS IS SOMEONE YOU DONT REALLY CARE TO GET TO KNOW AND GROW WITH,BUT THE FACT THAT U HAVE THE CONTROL TO JUZ HAVE HIM SEXUALY AND THATS IT AND U WANT TO SEE HOW FAR WOULD THEY GO TO HAVE U. NOW ITS DIFFERENT IF U WANT TO GROW WITH THAT PERSON.THEN THE PRIZE IS THE BEST BCUZ ITS NOT A CHASE ITS JUZ THE TIME AND GROWTH YALL PUT IN TO BE ON AN EMOTIONAL LEVEL

AS FAR AS DRESSING UP I DONT DO IT FOR THE COMPLIMENTS OF ANYONE ME PERSONALLY I DO IT FOR ME PERIOD,NOT FOR THE ATTENTION BUT BCUZ I ENJOY NICE THINGS AND I BUY IT TO WEAR IT,I LIKE TO LOOK GOOD AT ALL TIMES WITH MY MAN OR WITHOUT.

#2:
i love spending time getting all dolled up for myself or to go out with my girls. if im having a bad day, i’ll take a long steamy shower. put on some music, spend hrs doing my hair and make up, do the nails… everything to pamper myself. maybe put on lingerie and open the box wine or alize ( im not an ocean chick yet. im on a college student budget here. lol) & pop in a taye diggs or idris elba movie (oooh i love my men dark chocolate, but johnta…baby you could get it lol). i spend all that time and money on myself, just to feel good. if my girlfriends and i get all dressed up to go out, its not necessarily to grab attention from men. we just want to catch up and kick it. if you look good, most of the time you feel good about yourself.

but its a different story if im on a date with my man. by the time a guy comes to pick us up, we’ve already gone through 5 diff outfits trying on shoes and bags. guys dont know what we go through getting ready for you. calling your friends for advice and throwing clothes all over the bed. its hard so i’ll be damned if you just give me that old line”oh you look pretty”. im thinking in my head like are you for real? do you know how much effort a chick put into this whole look?and you come with that wack compliment. if a man really wants to be a gentlemen, take a real notice. sometimes all i really want you to say is “i love you in red, im gonna be all over you” make her twirl for you. it doesnt even have to be a big compliment. noticing something as simple as my lipgloss goes a long way. i love it when my boyfriend tries to guess the flavors of my lipgloss. its our thing now, he just keeps guessing and kissing me. noticing the little things is really important, it makes us feel special. so enough with the old tired ass lines. be original!

if you are a grown ass woman and you are faking orgasms you need to kill yourself. LOL I wish I would. You need to tell your man what you like if he cant figure it out on his own. Every woman is different but there are some common areas that everyone should know about. A closed mouth dont get fed and a woman faking an orgasm never gets one.

@ Monie219
Are you in Atlanta? I’m looking for a no strings attached situation!! LOL OK let me call you out, the only way it’s going to be a no strings attached situation is if the woman thinks the man is below her standard. Most of the time the woman will agree to a no strings attached situation just to try to get in a real relationship with the man, IF he is up to her standards..

@ anita
No disrespect but after reading your comment I was thinking you must not look that good. Don’t talk me to death http://i230.photobucket.com/albums/ee227/drspock513/me2.jpg here is my Oceans fly picture show yours. Most people that say they don’t care about looks say that because they don’t have any. And I’m not hard to find shawty, you can find me on the EAST of the A…LOL

As far as a man looking at another women when he is out that is something that will never change that’s why you see married men walking around the mall with their wife wearing shades. I hate to go here but THIS IS GLOBAL….JD has or had (who knows) one of the baddest chicks in the game hands down and they have been together for a min, if they are out together and a bad ass big butt chick walks by you are telling me he ain’t going to look? He can’t help it, men can’t help it. That’s like a black man trying to ignore a piece of chicken, it’s just not natural.

Any relationship advice holla at the DR!! 🙂

I agree with SweetDee..
We all love hanging out & gettin to know each other, but i think its the things HE does that makes u feel SPECIAL. The SINCERITY behind the ACTIONs. That look in his eyes when he see you. The butterflies you feel in his arms. That INTOXICATING LOVE DRUNK HIGH is what brings EXCITEMENT. People fail to realize WHAT IT TAKES TO GET HIM..IT TAKES TO KEEP HIM!!! That EXCITEMENT can last 4ever if we want it to.
As far as DRESS UP…I think its done for both SELF & HIM. I enjoy lookin GOOD because when people see us ..I want them to ENVY him & his EYE CANDY. If i FEEL & LOOK GOOD INSIDE & OUT its going to show & the ORGASM can be EXPLOSIVE!!! REMEMBER WOMEN are verbal..MAN are VISUAL!!!! He may not always say it LIFER CHICs..but if Ur DOIN U…right..lol HE IS DEFINITELY NOTICING!!!!!!!!!!

SPOCK IS GOING IN….I HAVE NO COMMENT OF THIS SUBJECT…CHURCH!!!!!!!!!

please Check Out This New Dance Called “DO THE FRESH PRINCE” by @TherealCS1

#1: ARE THE THINGS A MAN DOES TO GET IT, MORE EXCITING THAN THE SEX?

I would say yes to that one. At this point in my life it’s pretty hard to move me enough to want to have sex with a guy so if you can break that barrier than you’re definitely an amazing person that has excited me on a number of different levels. The sex will just be the cherry on top. But I also think it depends on the type of relationship you are looking for too. If you’re just trying to have sex of course the orgasm will be better than the chase. Sometimes the chase just gets in the way of what you really want, lol!

QUESTION #2: DO WOMEN REALLY ONLY CARE ABOUT HOW A MAN LOOKS AT THEM AND THE COMPLIMENTS THEY GET ONCE THERE ALL DOLLED UP?

Again. it depends. If its someone I’m with I like it more when he tells me what he likes about the way I am or what he likes about my personality. If I don’t know the guy I don’t care too much about the compliments that a man gives me when I’m dolled up because to me I just hear “can we fuck?” LOL, it may not be right but that’s the way I think. But it’s ok as long as he isn’t staring like he hasn’t eaten in a week or grabbing me. I also like compliments from women because then I know I’m looking good because there is no ulterior motive. Well at least I hope there isn’t.

Uhhh I don’t give a damn how great the chase is…..an orgasm will supercede every time. That’s just my opinion, all of the stuff leading up to that is just an aphrodisiac…a turn on if you will. If I get turned on and the sex is lack luster, then there will be a problem. In the words sang by Melonie Fiona “give it to me right or don’t give it to me at all”.

Now the type of interaction before the act of sex can play a beneficial role in having an orgasm, but the orgasm is still more important in my book.

As far as the compliment thing….who the hell doesn’t like compliments when they have went the extra mile to get dolled up? I don’t think that is necessarily a female issue…it’s a matter of validation for some.

Spock you stupid as hell how you gonna call her ugly like that? LMAOOO

i have done the no strings attached sex thing and it lasted all of about 3 months. women say they can do it but they are just lying to themselves. We arent built for that shit so we need to stop perpetuating that bullshit.

1. THE CHASE IS ALWAYS BETTER, its the anticaption of getting it thats so exciting(the rush). 2. Women i would say dont actually get dressed up just for u to compimant them but jack there swagg up a thousand bars(if she has any). The skinny is all things r done with a purpose something is never for nothing, either its for personal r group reasons.

Great reading on this topic.

@Heatha77 – I like you.

@SPOCK….. That’s why you my nigga i fucks with you my weebles! PREACH! Plus who knows what the fuck these dumbass women want nowdays the media and material shit have taken over their souls they cant recognize real niggas anyway!

The chase and the sex go hand in hand. If a man does come at you correctly then you don’t want to mess with him anyway. At the same time if you talk about your sex game and can’t back it up then obviously the chase was more exciting because you’ve spent all this time imagining how he’s gonna put it down then he FAILS (luckly I’ve never had that experience). As for the compliments, I’m more of a dress for comfort type female. I’m confident enough in myself not to fish for compliments. Is it nice to hear evry once in a blue moon, yeah, but it’s not the highlight of my day. In my mind if he tried to holla thats a compliment in itself isn’t it? He’s not gonna holla at something he’s not attracted to. If you’re still with him then that’s a compliment also because he could have just fucked you and moved on. NOW to address ol’ boy who said woman can’t do no strings attached…maybe he’s been tryin it with the wrong females. I can. From what I’ve been exposed to it’s the guys who get sprung and won’t leave me the hell alone. Standards have nothing to do with it. I just don’t want to be in a relationship but like the benefits of a steady dick. Point blank. But hey, I’m only a 19 year-old female, what do I know right.

OK…FIRST OF ALL, I’M NOT YOUR TYPICAL GIRL. I’M SORT OF A TOM BOY. SO THE WHOLE CARING ABOUT HOW HE LOOKS AT ME WHEN I’M ALL DOLLED UP ISN’T SOMETHING I NEED FOR A MAN TO DO. IT’S RARE IF OR WHEN I EVEN GET DRESSED UP. I DO IT WHEN I ABSOLUTELY NEED TO. NOW FOR THE FIRST QUESTION, IT’S SORT OF A YES AND NO DEPENDING ON HOW THE GUY OPERATES. CAUSE HE CAN BE TERRIBLE AT THE BEFORE STUFF AND THEN YOU’RE LIKE…OK STOP ALREADY IT’S CATCHING FIRE DOWN THERE…LOL. BUT IF HE IS ON POINT, THEN HELL’S YEAH….IT’S BETTER THAN THE ACTUAL DOING. AND IF HE REALLY REALLY GOOD AT THE BEFORE, A GIRL MIGHT GET LUCKY AND ENJOY THE WHOLE DAMN THING. SOMETHING THAT WILL MAKE YA HEAD BLOW OFF!

I’M BACK LOL I AGREE WITH SEAN UP THERE…JD WE NEED TO HAVE MORE TOPICS LIKE THIS TO GET THE LADIES & FELLOWS GETTIN TO THE BOTTOM OF THE BULLSHIT & AS YOU CAN TELL THIS IS A HOT TOPIC…CHURCH!!! LADIES COME FUCK WITH THE KING….BETTER SOONER THAN LATER LOL

Hello JD,

What seems to get me to the sex is what is happening in the beginning meaning a good conversation with us having eye contact to an unexpected hug. So the chase does a lot to make the sex great. Sometimes the before gets me so worked up that when the sex does happen I may get there to soon but I guess that is ok because that just leaves me more time to have a few more. Compliments are good whenever not just when I get dressed up for an event. I just like for him to me and sometimes speak on it that really puts a smile on my face…….

Thanks for asking Patrice

“UNLESS YOU HAVE A MIRROR THAT WALKS IN FRONT OF YOU EVERY WHERE YO GO” you are getting dressed up for somebody else to see.Men and women do it.
People need to stop denying there normal human trait of attention.Everybody wants it in life,no exceptions.

Women love to be chased and crave attention.
Some peoples egos sit on a high horse but in reality its a show pony.

#1- This is where men like Spock always get shit twisted! Sometimes a woman’s only interest is in getting their back blown out(& that happens more often than guys like to think),not every guy I have sex with is looked at as a possible relationship/love that’s what FWB & 1 night stands are for…..in those instances the chase is a waste of time because we both know what we’re here for so the orgasm is more enjoyable.
Now the flip is, when I’m with someone that has the potential to be something more even then the orgasm is still more exciting but the chase enhances it.

#2- Honestly, the attention & compliments I get when I’m not “dolled up” is more appealing to me. If I’m gonna have sex with u you’re eventually gonna see me not in top form more often than not anyway especially if u’re worth coming back for more. But when in a relationship it’s nice to step out with your man looking like a million bucks to compliment him so he doesn’t look like he’s with a “scrub”.

@Bootyinyoface
I think I need your help sister. You are right I got it twisted. Can you continue to help me? Are you in Atlanta? LOL

every woman craves attention and loves to be complimented and if you’re grown, the sex isn’t always as great as you thought it would be so the chase is definitely more exciting than the orgasm

QUESTION #1: ARE THE THINGS A MAN DOES TO GET IT, MORE EXCITING THAN THE SEX?

No. I don’t think you can separate the two. Although, I think some men may be stronger and more skilled at the chase than they are in the bed that it ends up being disappointing to the woman because the man was too small or did not know what to do with his own equipment to please the woman. I have heard a lot of women say that they fake orgasms, by the way, so they are cheating themselves to please him. The first time I had an orgasm, I did not know what it was, but I knew it felt good. The guy was just so big he did not really have to do a lot. When I met my current guy, he set it off for real. He was older and more experienced and after he chased me for so long I was ready for whatever. lol I had all kinds of physiological experiences. We laughed about it a lot in the early part of our relationship. It was all good. The chase and the climax. Hell, I even made him come so much that it hurt. He could not even ejaculate. I thought he was going to die on me. lol I know that was TMI. Just keepin’ it real. We are all grown–hopefully.

Anyway, I hear these women talking about just having sex for the sake of having sex. I have a friend who will darn near sleep with anyone. She has slowed down a little bit though. She acts like she does not care when she sleeps with a guy and he never calls her or when they only call for the booty call and never take her on a date, but she does care. She thinks an impressive chase starts with a man asking for her number at a club and that is enough for her to sleep with them–in a van, in a car, or at their place. She has low-self esteem and really has never had a boyfriend. She is a great person, but what she is looking for in the short-lived chase is attention, love and respect and a relationship, which she does not allow herself to get with all of the quickies. I am not saying that this is the way all women who just want sex are deep inside. I think that kind of thing is what it is– a chase that leads up to one raunchy night in the parking lot or somebody’s house never to be heard of or respected again. Some women, like men, want that. I don’t.

Truthfully, I am getting older and I find all kinds of men attractive–great wit, great mind, great body, grat humor, spirituality and a drive to succeed on their own terms and by their own definition. I think it is obviously hormonal first and it progresses. If I date a man, I am quite possibly sexually attracted to him already–anything can cut the chase short though–funky breath or a big a** unjustifiable ego (not to be confused with Beyonce’s “Ego”). lol If I allow a man to pursue a relationship with me he is already going to get my goodies if he plays his cards right. I am not talking about playing games. I don’t do games. He does not even have to have a lot of money. I am not rich so it never really plays a part in my selection of men. Although, he needs to know how to manage his money or that is a problem. I am just trying to see what kind of person he is. I don’t do one-night stands, I don’t cheat with married men or men in relationships and I never have slept with someone on the first date or without being in an exclusive relationship.

I love sex. I love men only. I am not and never will be a jump-off. I have to be in a relationship with a man to have sex with him and I have not been in very many relationships (5) compared to my circle of friends and that is the truth. All of my relationships have lasted over a year at minimum. I was shy when I was younger so conversations did not come easily for me and I mostly observed what other people were going through, but I have always been that committed chick who wants a solid relationship. My break-ups are even easy. I can still be friends afterwards, but I do move on and they usually regret the break-up. So, he better be good to me during the chase because he gets nada if he is not. I have learned the hard way with boys (during my teen years) who helped me understand what kind of man I wanted in my life. I can go years without sex and being in relationships because I want more than sex. I have gone years without sex. It was not easy; I was on fire, but I did survive my period of abstinence.

The chase is important to me, but it is not just his job to make it known that he is interested. I want a man to chase me and when I am in a relationship, I make it my business to make sure the chase continues and that the sex is popping on my end as well. I have read the books and seen the films. I know what works for my man and I just get creative and change it up just a bit. I don’t play around with it. We respond to each other. It can be quick or it can slow, long and sweaty. He can please me or I can just please him for the moment. So, the flirtation, the comments, and the discussions during dates or phone conversations that bring us closer in our relationship all lead up to the sex, which is always going to be on point. I have never had a bad sexual experience although some were much better than others. I have had bad “chase” experiences–lets just say that no one expects a teenaged boy to be committed to his teenaged inexperienced and virginal girlfriend, but it did not make me bitter–just smarter.

Anyway, to continue, we can both work at keeping it hot and having multiple orgasms at the end of the enduring chase. When he stops chasing and being respectful to me I close the candy store and move on with my life without him. I am an Ocean’s Chick after-all. lol I can make it on my own until the next gentleman comes along. I don’t do thugs and criminals. I want someone to build a life and family with not someone I am going to spend a lifetime visiting at a grave or in prison. I am not looking for a hustler, but he can have hustler-like qualities. lol In other words, he knows how to make it in the world and won’t depend on me to survive and stay strong. Most of all, I am looking for a MAN who loves God, me, his children and himself more than anything in this world. The chase is one tiny fraction of the process.

QUESTION #2: DO WOMEN REALLY ONLY CARE ABOUT HOW A MAN LOOKS AT THEM AND THE COMPLIMENTS THEY GET ONCE THEY ARE ALL DOLLED UP?

Of course, women care and so do men. Don’t you want to know that you look sexy and that you are loved? Don’t you want your woman to come on to you, pop you on your behind and take you down because you are looking quite delicious? Why do the Ocean’s 7 get all dressed up and looking fabulous–just because? I don’t think so. Quite honestly, everyone is turned on by different things. One of my exes from when I was in college used to love looking at me when I wore my glasses. ?? He thought it was sexy. Sometimes, I can be in some jeans and a cute t-shirt and get hollered at by some guy. I was running on the riverside in another state in some sweaty shorts that were too big and faded and a regular t-shirt and got hollered at twice by guys passing by in cars. I can’t go to the grocery store without this employee calling me out every time. He knows what’s up, but I am not even interested. lol So, having said that, I seem to get more compliments from people, in general, when I am not “dolled up”. When I do dress up (formally/club attire), which is not very often, I get even more compliments because people are not used to seeing me in make-up and something more formal. I don’t go out to clubs or anything like that really so I don’t need to dress up for too many occasions. I do comb my hair at all times OR I throw a hat on my head. lol

I dress according to my feelings. I dress to go to work. I dress for the event. If it is a sports event I am not going in heels not even for the sake of looking sexy. My man will flirt with me if I am just wearing some raggedy, tight sweatpants if he likes what he sees. He does not really even care if I put on a few pounds — he still likes my hour glass figure either way–the big booty, tiny waist, and tig ole bitties still get him aroused. If I am feeling sexy then I pull out the pumps and whatever I feel sexy in. If we are about to do the do then I may wear something sexy, but we both know it won’t be on for long. If my man likes my attire then cool! If he does not compliment me it won’t break my heart. I am already feeling sexy or whatever. Besides, I think some people are sexy without trying and that is the way I feel about myself. Also, if you are in a long, committed relationship you grow to love each other for other things than appearances. You have seen each other looking sick and rough on the those “I don’t care” days, and on those looking fabulous days. 😉 On some days, I may just exude sexiness in my tank top and jeans. I may not even being trying. Maybe it is the hormones I am kicking off. lol Compliments are always appreciated and often unexpected even if it is not from my man and most often they don’t come from him.

QUESTION #1: ARE THE THINGS A MAN DOES TO GET IT, MORE EXCITING THAN THE SEX?

I think the chase is better.If he can stimulate my mind way before he even stimulates my clit, it makes sex that much sweeter. He gets bonus points if he picks up on the things that turn me on.

QUESTION #2: DO WOMEN REALLY ONLY CARE ABOUT HOW A MAN LOOKS AT THEM AND THE COMPLIMENTS THEY GET ONCE THERE ALL DOLLED UP?

I don’t get dolled up often unless the occasion calls for it(which is rare). When I get them–from both men and women–they’re nice. But I personally find it much more appealing when I get the attention and compliments when I’m not dressed up from head to toe.

I wear what I want to wear because its what makes me feel good whether its a dress or a shirt and some bondage pants.

You can be all dolled up everyday of your life but if you don’t feel good and feel sexy inside, then it shows.

If I get compliments from a guy-great. If not, I’m not going to fall over and die because of it.

@Anita

Ok you are not ugly. I kind of like your style, you give yourself room to get all dolled up!! Cool.. I had to check you!!! 🙂

@SPOCK YOU ARE NUTS!!!! LOL But I feel you on somethings. Although, I’ve been in a no strings attached relationship for 2 years and neither of us started catching feelings until just recently– when he purposely got me pregnant. Yes, it was on purpose. ITS NOT ALWAYS THE WOMEN!!!!!

@ MisTif

Congrads on the baby Tiff, I believe you some guys do try to get women pregnant, regardless life is a gift. BUT women have played that card a lot more often then men!! But it takes two!!

There you go Heatha77

I’VE BEEN TOLD IM NOT A TYPICAL FEMALE LOL BUT STILL, I HAVE 2 SAY A RESOUNDING NOOOO!! TO BOTH QUESTIONS!

I DRESS BASED ON HOW I FEEL AT THE TIME & THE OCCASION. IT’S IMPORTANT 4 DUDE 2 SEE THAT & ACCEPT THAT KUZ THERE MAY BE TIMES I DNT FEEL LIKE GETTING “DOLLED UP,” & HE’D NEED 2 BE KOOL WITH ME DRESSED DOWN JUST AS MUCH AS ME DRESSD UP. (BTW, IT’S NEVER TAKEN ME 30 MIN 2 GET READY. LOL EXCEPT MAYBE FOR MY HS & COLLEGE GRADUATIONS & PROM. LOL)

Man how did this turn into “Who in the ATL wants to be Spock’s cut buddy?” LOL A hot ass mess! But I left the ATL for a lot of the reasons mentioned. I have never been into the ballers. I’m into smart dudes that are honest. They are just so hard to find. I would perfectly content on a Saturday night with me and himcurled up on the sofa watching Suze Orman! I moved to Chicago and ran into nothing but manwhores and pimps. LOL

@Kandi
From the pot to the frying pan…. That is funny. You on the southside of Chi? You better watch how you wear your hat!!! That is so funny because a lot of my friends I met at Morehouse that were smart and just a good brother in general were always being over looked. Between the Gays, the brothers locked down, uneducated brothers, or the ones looking for Women to take care of them (This is a whole new issue, yes there are brothers just looking for women to take care of them–I can’t understand that one) Women have less guys to pick from. The guys that are doing what they are suppose to be doing are going to be cocky because they know how many women are looking for them.. That’s the problem…so what’s the solution?

1. Yes the chase can be more exciting than the sex. And that’s mainly because a lot of men don’t follow through with amazing sex. They want to do nice things for you and be all over you , talk a big game but then the sex is boring and after they act like assholes. So women enjoy the chase cuz there is nothing like feeling wanted all damn day, all damn week. After sex guys slack off and just do enough to get by because now they got it. How lame is that ?
2. I don’t think I live for the the compliments but it is a big part of why I get dressed up. And it’s funny because even when I go out and I say I don’t want any guys in my face I just want to have a good time with my girls, I’ll still be disappointed if not enough guys at least try to get my number or buy me a drink.

No I am NOT on the southside I rarely go to the city. Them niggas don’t give a fuck. They shoot at anyone. I am NOT tryin to be on the news. Now I have had men who have told me they would have no problems staying home and me taking care of them. They got put on the bench. Only to be called up when one of my starters fouls out of the game. And just like Tif I have had 3 dudes TRY and get me pregnant. I don’t play that shit. You can try all you want I keep my shit locked down like Fort Knox in this bitch. And when you show that side of yourself you automatically get thrown out of the game. Lol
Oh BTW… Cool song. My fav right now is Makin Love by Fabo and Neyo…LOL

@Moni Good answer you kept real best answer on here whats your sign. I had the same situation.

WOW! lmao, Anyway this is not a yes or no question. I agree with a lot of what Nikki said, especially about ur man telling you ur sexy while you are curled up with a book, glasses on, in shorts and a tee (not her exact words, but you get it). On the most part sometimes women and or men do dress for themselves, we all have to admit our attitude ( alot of times) change with the type of attire we are wearing. There is some innate “force” that would make a female want look appealing for a male because males are prodominately visual creatures vs women more emotional(not in a bad way).

As for the chase. If the brotha has no skills, of course it will be better. There are somethings you should not have to tell a man or a women. Preference is one thing but come on, a lil help is one thing but please. Some folks just need to step it up!

SPOCK IS A FOOL! NIGGA YOU GOTTA BE MY BROTHER FROM ANOTHER MOTHER HIT ME!

@spock That song is phat as hell!!! LOL Love it!!! Stanks for sharing. 😀

These comments are hilarious!! Spock thinks his ass knows everything! Lol.#1 While a Orgasm is an incredible feeling it only lasts but a few seconds! Knowing Your man(not some random nigga u sleeping with) desires u completely. Mind body & soul Yes that is far more fullfilling than an Orgasm. Some of yall r confusing Love w/ Lust!! #2 I agree w/ whoever said we women get dressed for other women not for compliments. Key word WOMEN not girls. I myself get dressed so I can be the flyest woman in the room wherever I am. So I can make sure I’m not blending in w/no other bitch there, wether I’m dressed up or down! not to get compliments. But I do love it when my man compliments me & he does and I compliment him as well. Sex & love is 2 diff things! Hence “Making Love” & “Fucking”!!!

Outta cheaaa

@Spock

True, it does take two. I just need to start checking for a condom during every position switch LOL.

But I honestly don’t know how we’re going to solve the problem of finding the “Right” person. Maybe stop looking all together and wait for him (or her) to find us (that may take a while). Or maybe we need to just try our chances with the ones that usually don’t fit our standards. You know, The ones that approach us that we usually don’t give the time of the day. Beggars can’t be Choosers; and you never know who you’re missing out on. Image isn’t everything! I’ve met a few guys who are genuinely great guys, but If I wasn’t in a good mood the day that I met them, I would’ve turned them away. One in particular had no game or “swag” and he was sort of expecting me to turn him away. I assumed he’s not used to meeting girls and actually accomplishing the mission of getting her number and a conversation.

My point is, he had great conversation and we had a lot in common.

Thanks for the Congrats btw. 6 more weeks left!!! I’m def feeling the song ha I’m adding it to my Favs.