HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY to all the moms, grandmoms, aunties, sisters, guardians, mentors, and teachers who are mother figures for us all.

MALCOLM X’S GRANDSON, Malcolm Shabazz, is being reported dead at age 29 by the Amsterdam News, one of America’s oldest Black newspapers, and by the U.S. Embassy: http://tinyurl.com/bo5u23k

CHARLES RAMSEY AND PRACTICING YOGA. Yoga teaches us to breathe, to focus, to meditate with our eyes wide open, to let go of things we cannot control, to put positive energy into the universe, to understand how to use a very small space with just a mat and our bodies, in order to do very big things with and for ourselves. I am thinking of this as I prepare to go to Bikram Yoga class shortly, and as I continue to read a lot of wild, mean-spirited, and unnecessary comments about Charles Ramsey on facebook and twitter, about his character, his looks, his use of language. The kind of things that say some of us really do not like people who are either different from us, or who remind some of us where we come from, or who we have right in our own families. Things that make me very very sad coming from people who should know better, but simply do not, clearly. So much more to say but will do so at another time. I prefer going to my daily workout and doing something productive, instead of engaging folks who see ugliness where there is actually beauty. In a world where women and girls are routinely abused, kidnapped and assaulted in some form every single day all over the Earth here comes a man named Charles Ramsey who heard a woman’s voice and chose to do the opposite of what had been done to them for the past ten years by men. He became a male ally and helped when he could have looked the other way. Rather than focusing on Mr. Ramsey’s looks or the way he speaks why are not more people talking about the violence and terror women and girls have to deal with any and everywhere? Perhaps because so few of us are actually doing anything to change that, so jokes and disses of Mr. Ramsey become an easy way not to deal with raw realities. We mock him to make ourselves feel good. Meanwhile the madness continues as we do little or nothing to change our society and world except talk mad ish on facebook and twitter….

MUST-READ: An Open letter to Charles Ramsey: An American Hero Turned National Joke: http://tinyurl.com/cbw2tct

SINCE MAY IS MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH I would like to say this, please: I do not know anyone, like anyone, who has not suffered emotionally at some point in her or his life. I definitely have. It is one reason why things like therapy, physical exercise, church, yoga practice, writing, speaking, volunteering to serve others, routinely engaging arts and culture, and other ways to manage and deal are more important to me now than ever, and why all are central parts of my life. As we have heard many times ”hurt people hurt other people.” Also very clear to me that many of us have been so socialized to expect the worst from others, from each other, that we do not have the emotional tools, at times (if ever), to deal with ourselves or each other in ways that are loving, life-affirming, supportive, completely honest, forgiving, or consistently kind. I have definitely been guilty of this in my many lives, no question. Yet at some point we’ve got to be able to look in the mirror regularly and take stock of who we are in that moment, what is working for us emotionally and what we need to work on, very seriously. Else we will be stuck in the same emotional spaces for a very very long time, just wallowing in our hurts and pains with no healing and no forward motion. Or, if others are stuck somewhere like that they will only know how to relate to you from a position of hurt or anger or trauma and nothing you can say or do will allow them to see you as the human being you are now. So, to me, mental health is as important as physical exercise and having some sort of spiritual foundation (not talking about organized religion, which is very different and a very different conversation). Indeed, the mental, physical, and spiritual work on ourselves must go hand in hand. In basic terms it is called self-love and self-care.

On Sunday I’m riding in NYC’s annual 5-borough bicycle tour. Charity I’m supporting is The Innocence Project: http://tinyurl.com/cj9uhzm